Copywrong!..

Do you like any of my photographs? I'm so glad to hear to it! Then, by all means, help yourself! Copy them, take them, use them as you please because I'm afraid, if the Government gets its way, that's what you'd soon be able to do without thought of paying me a penny for the privilege. Their 'Orphan Works' act, which has just been passed, will mean that any photograph on the internet might be fair game for free useage as long as a 'diligent search' for the Copyright owner has taken place. Diligent search? You mean, you looked for metadata but it had all been removed? Ah, that's ok, carry on! And all this in the name of making 'the UK's enterprise culture one of the best places to do business' ...! Well, I'm sorry, but my business is selling photographs, so thank you, gorgeous government, for just removing my ability to earn a living! But don't think this just applies to professionals. If you put any image online there's a chance it might suddenly appear .. well, anywhere! .. and used by anyone for whatever purpose they like! I've watermarked my internet images for quite a while now but, you can rest assured, the ©opyright logo will be a lot bolder on them from now on...

Hive of activity..

There's a buzz around Brussels today as the powers that be try to get a ban on the insecticides that are thought to be knocking off our bees! After that we just have to educate all the idiots that freak out as soon as one of the little fellas comes near them. Stop flapping! You won't get stung! A bee is not a human! It won't attack you just out of its own selfish interests! Not like the ministers and chemical companies that would have us continue using neonicotinoids just because it makes them billions of dollars! No proof it's those chemicals? Hey, no proof it isn't either, so let's get 'em halted until we know for sure what's causing the decline. Can you imagine a world where Lesley's little grand-daughters didn't know what was a'buzzin' round the lupins in my photo...?

New shoots ..

Months of hard work come together tomorrow when I hold the first of my 'Presently..' plant sales in Culcheth Village centre. I've been growing plants to accompany my Florescence flower photography range and will offer everything from tulips to anenomes and passion flowers - with a free photographic greetings cards with every purchase. The idea is that people can buy a small plant and give it as a gift with the card. The photograph on the card shows what the little plant will - presently - grow into! It's a little subtle addition to the photographic services I offer, and here's hoping it's the start of a growth industry..

Speaking of diversifying, did you see the programme about the photographer Norman Parkinson? What a character he was, changing his name from Ron Smith and eventually 'inventing' his own brand of sausage because he couldn't get a decent banger in his adopted home of Tobago. Mind you, I'll bet every photographer I know can tell you about a character they've come across in this wonderful busines of ours. I'll always remember Derek Eastwood, the first ever freelance photographer at the Manchester Evening News (I was the second!) He was the Weegee of Oldham, constantly tuned in to police and emergency service radio frequencies and quite often beating them to the scenes of fires and traffic accidents (This was in the days when the 'papers would publish the pix!) He was constantly wired - literally and mentally - and smoked himself to death about twenty years ago, poor sod!

Anyway, better go water the gladioli...

1982. I like it here..

I had a little freshen up of the images on my Twelve for '13 page today, as it'll soon be time to upload the next exciting installment of the project. (May 1st, since you ask!) Yesterday I was talking about my archive to a chap who said that was all well and good but he always looked forwards, never back. I said to him I hoped that by showing my 'old' work I'd get new work and projects from it. I'd be moving forwards - not lingering in the past but using the work - much of which still hasn't been seen by anybody - to produce new opportunities. Having said that, I noticed that one of my favourite bands, The Meat Puppets, are playing in Manchester in June. I've liked these guys since I bought their first album in 1982! I bought a ticket and put it on the pile of other bands I'll be seeing this year .. PiL, The B-52s, Mudhoney, The Exploited, Discharge! You spotting a theme here?
It's the Eighties again, folks! I like it here...

Tell 'em about the exhibition, Martin..

It's like bloody buses round here! Having just teamed up with the chap that's making the Chris Sievey film I spent yesterday meeting with an artist who wants to involve my work in his future shows, and then checking out the venue for a new exhibition I'm having! Three new projects in the space of two days! Phew! Anyway, the 'new' venue is a restaurant in Eccles called Smiths. It offers wall space to local artists, and the owners invited me to exhibit after seeing my Twelve for '13 show at Eccles Art Gallery. This new show will start in the middle of May and, well .. Smiths? Guess what pictures I'll be showing! Correct! Although, as well as my Morrissey shots, the idea came up in conversation that I should show a few of my archive photographs that relate to food and drink. Restaurant? Food and Drink? Geddit? To be honest, I didn't think I'd have enough pictures for that to work ..  and then I started trawling! I've ended up with over a hundred shots that have something to do with food or drink. Today's image is one of 'em.
Have you worked it out?..

Move on up to the Kwik-Save Disco..

I had another of those amazing photographic coincidences yesterday when a piece popped up on Facebook to say that a film was being planned on the life and times of the late Chris Sievey. (He was the singer in Timperley pop/punk band The Freshies, though will always be better known as the head in the head of Frank Sidebottom - if you see what I mean!) I contacted the director of the film to say I'd photographed a Freshies gig at Bowdon Vale Youth Club just two weeks before I shot Joy Division there, and had then set up a photo-shoot with them which we did around Sale, just south of Manchester city centre. Amazingly, he said that he'd been going through Chris' personal possessions, and had come across two sheets of contact prints featuring those very shots. However, being a dimbo of an eighteen year old I'd not put any ID on the contacts, so he didn't know who'd taken the pictures. Then a mutual friend of ours - the writer Mick Middles - identified them as being mine, and the director was just on the verge of contacting me when I dropped him that email. So, with any luck the shots will feature in the film, and I've been asked if I'll be interviewed myself to talk about the work. The funny thing is that last year I photographed Mick's Wedding to the lovely Vicki, and we recreated one of my Freshies' shots down the ramp of the Tesco car-park! Have a look at it here .. and now please join me in a rousing chorus of "The men from banana island whos (sic) stupid ideas never caught on in the western world as we know it" Two, three four....

The stuff of nightmares ..

Well there's a first time for everything, and I was emailed over the weekend by one of my 'brides to be' telling me how she'd been dreaming about me overnight! How lovely! Actually, if you insist on her exact words, she said she'd had a nightmare about me which involved me turning up to photograph her Wedding after it was all done and dusted! It honestly moved her enough to mail me and check I did actually have her Wedding booked for September! I have, I have and, trust me, if there's anyone who's more freaked out about not getting to a Wedding on time .. it's me! I've been known to be at a venue two hours before a Wedding if the journey looked like it might be a bit dodgy. No harm in allowing a little extra time, and I can always do the crossword in the car! Just the second part of her e-mail to deal with now. Apparently in her dream I turned up in a black and white striped top! What a nightmare! Everyone knows if it's a Wedding it'd be sepia!...

Cheesed off ..

News just in, folks! The cheese is off ..

Ok, not off off, just postponed! Oh, sorry, what I mean is the cheese factory shoot I was scheduled to do next week has been put back a few weeks. Their web-designers are going to town with a whole new revamp and want to make sure they get it right before they 'send me in'. One mistake now and it could be the thin end of the wedge .. !

Anyway, about the Tom Wood exhibition at the National Media Museum. I went to see it the other day and, erm .. I'm not impressed! There was one photograph that I liked from the whole show. One! And the thing is, the work is very similar to mine - with only a tenth of the humour. (I told you the Green-eyed monster would put a show in) I'm really pleased he's got a big show like this, but I really wish someone would show an interest in my archive.  Until then, just my hard-cheese, innit!

No Blog! Hot dog...

Blimey, too busy to write a blog? What is going on? Here, have a hot-dog, instead! This is one of the favourites in my archive. Did she ever get any ketchup on that hotdog?...

Stamp your mark ..

I passed a derelict Post Office in Salford yesterday. God knows how long it's been closed but look at this .. a book of stamps for 50p! A book! Nowadays a single first class stamp costs 60p! Anyway, I was on my way to the Deli-Lama cafe on Chapel Street, who have said I can have their walls for a mini Music Photography exhibition when they next become available. Don't all rush out at once, though! We're talking this time next year! God knows how much stamps will cost then!..

I'm going to Bradford today to check out the Tom Wood exhibition at the Media Museum though be warned .. I may return an envy-ridden, spiteful twisted snapper! There's just something about his work that makes me think 'Well, if they're showing his, why don't show mine?' The green-eyed monster has risen!..

Great times for PR photography at the mo! This week I'm shooting everything from a plain old cheque presentation to a Teaching Academy event, from winners of a motorbike competition to a new brochure with Gordon Burns, and next week I've a whole day in a cheese-factory to look forward to! I'm really enjoying stamping my style on the work...

Boston ..

By a bizarre quirk of fate I had already planned to show you this photograph on my blog today, as it's one of the latest additions to my 'Seen..' project on Flickr. After last night's bombings in Boston I wavered a little over my choice, but I've decided to leave it in as a mark of respect to those poor people whose beautiful lives were so tragically cut short. One of the reasons I was going to show the shot was because I wanted to wax lyrical about the wonders of Spring and how, despite everything, it's so amazing to be in the middle of all this burgeoning new life. It's all we can do to honour those murdered by terrorism - in whatever country - to try to hold in our minds that it is, it really is, a wonderful world we live in!

Funny story brewing ...

Life threw me one last funny story to end my music photography exhibition in Eccles on Saturday. When I arrived to take down my photographs there was a young chap looking at the work, and the gallery 'boss' introduced me as the photographer. "Great pictures.." he said to me "Fantastic! Amazing! Brill..." Ok, he didn't go that mad, he just said he liked the work, and asked the cost of a 16x12. "It's not for me.." he added, rather too quickly for my liking "It's for my girlfriend, she's crazy about Morrissey!" "Well.." I said "She's not alone. Did she see him on that programme last week?" (Victoria Wood made a programme about the story of tea, and interviewed Morrissey over a cuppa in New York) "See it?.." he laughed "She's so nuts about Moz that now she knows he uses a tea-pot she's gone out and bought one!!..."

Hmmm... Tea! Photography in Eccles! How am I going to tie those two together? Aha, a nice old picture of me dear old Dad, clutching the packet of tea-bags he'd just nipped out to buy on his lunch-break - circa 1979! It proved to be one of the more popuar photographs in the recent Twelve for '13 exhibition. Dad used to drink tea like it was going out of fashion. With five sugars! Sweet!...

The writing's on the wall..

Off to Nunsmere Hall this morning to shoot the engagement portrait of Sam and Steve, whose Wedding I'm photographing there in three weeks. The engagement photograph I'm showing you today is of Laura and Chris - and Odie! - who got married last Saturday at Thornton Hall (Just Laura and Chris, not the dog! Oh, you got that bit ..) Anyway, I made it into a big signing board and it was placed at the door to their Wedding breakfast for guests to add their best wishes. (I even supplied the Sharpie!) Unfortunately, it seemed no-one 'dared' start the signatures off, and the board was still empty as I left the Wedding, meaning I didn't get a picture of it full of squiggles. I've made a mental note to tell Sam and Steve's Best Man and Chief Bridesmaid that they should get the ball rolling and have signatures on the board before anyone else sees it. Two write!...

Out, out, out..

Yes, this was taken in a Labour heartland - or Eccles, as we call it - back in the days of the Miners' Strike of 1985, and I just love the mis-spelling of the word 'Thatcher' on the posters. The writer liked it so much he wrote it twice, even though it's such a bugger to pronounce! (I've been spitting all over my desk since I dug the picture out!) Actually, Eccles might not have been such a bedrock of socialism as it appears, judging by the way the 'Victory' poster has been vandalised. Happily, we're all entitled to our opinion and, as the pickets proved, you can't beat a bit of a banner-waving crowd-rant to get your views across - something Paris Brown might be mulling over right now. As the first - and most fleeting - Youth Commissioner she found out the hard way that what goes around comes around, and if she did one useful thing in the run-up to her new job it was to show the kids of today that, in a decent society, you can't just creep round under the cowardly cover of the social media saying what the hell you like about people.
For that, I thank you, Parith!..

Rock 'n roll, eventually..

I was like a kid in a sweet shop when I heard that 70s punk band The Exploited were playing a one-off gig at The Ritz in Manchester, and I suddenly had this bizarre vision of myself as a doddery old bloke turning up to watch the relics of some long-split band slowly going through their set at tea-party in Manchester Town Hall. You know, like 'old people' go to dances of a Wednesday afternoon? Or sit in the park watching brass bands on Sundays? I'd be just like that "Ah, the old ones.." I'd sigh "They don't write 'em like that any more! Eeeeh, Mildred, look at Charlie Harper go! He's a hundred and six, you know!..."
Bloody Nora!...

Bits, bobs, moustaches..

Time for a little light relief after all that doom and gloom of Thatcher/North Korea/Benefit Cuts/Man U losing in the Derby (The Man U bit was a joke! I really couldn't give a monkeys!) Here, have a picture of Laura with a moustache! You'd swear I'd set the shot up, but it really was just a little trouble with the wind! Gave us a laugh as we fired off the last couple of 'formal' portraits before Saturday's Wedding Breakfast, and I know (Hope!) Laura will forgive me for showing it to you all!

My Music Photography exhibition ends this Saturday and that really - no, really! - will be the last stuff I show at the gallery for the time being. What started out as a four week show to launch my Twelve for '13 project turned into a four month 'residency' as I ended up featuring in the next two group shows with my Florescence and Music photography. Anyway, get down to Eccles Community Art Gallery this Saturday if you want to catch me!

Remember that exciting news I spoke about? The 'stuff in the pipeline' .. ? Well, it's still in the bloody pipe and I can't get anyone to shake it out! Aaaagh! I really hope it comes off! I'm dying to tell you...

Must dash! ..

Bye bye, Marmite..

  

 So that's the end of Marmite Thatcher! You either loved her or you loathed her but one thing's for sure .. you'll never forget her! I had the honour of photographing her twice - either side of her time at Number Ten. I photographed her first when she visited Manchester on her campaign trail in 1979. That was before she'd had her teeth done! She was walking amongst us accompanied by Winston Churchill! No, not that one, his grandson, the Conservative member for Stretford and Urmston! You can just see his receding hairline in the left-hand picture! The second time I shot her (Oops!) was when her premiership was all done and dusted and she'd just published her autobiography in, I think, 1993. I went 'backstage' with her, at Waterstones of all places, and actually asked her for her autograph. She gave it me, too! That's my photo of it in between the portraits. 

So, another 'Great' of our time is gone, but it does make you wonder .. 

Where are our 'Greats' of the future??...

You got me, sunshine...

Married! And Saturday's groom Chris just couldn't resist showing off his Wedding ring to new bride Laura! Wow, what a fantastic Wedding Day that was - the kind I haven't had for a good five months. It just had that certain extra something, that wow factor, that ..  erm, hang on, it'll come to me .. ah, the sun! That was it! It had sunshine! All Day Long! It even, as I mentioned on Saturday, gave me sunburn! But what a delight it was to see bride, groom and guests actually willingly going outside at Thornton Hall to enjoy their celebratory drinks! Jeez, I'll never complain about the sunshine being too bright, ever again! We're finally back to the season of contrejour and fill-in flash! Hurrah! Yippee! Yee Haaa....  - it'll probably pour down for seven months now that I've said that! But do you want to know what really brightened up my day, though? A guest came up to me whilst I was shooting and said "It's great to see someone who enjoys their work!" Man, the sun started shining out of .. Anyway, check out the pix here, and see what you think...

Wed/Tanned...

Blog update! Back from the Wedding at Thornton Hall Hotel. Nearly 800 shots and the year's first sunburn! Oh joy, oh joy!! Congratulations to Laura and Chris!...

Now post the past...

No Grand National for me today, as I'm off to the Wirral to shoot a Wedding at Thornton Hall, though I'm rather hoping I won't get a repeat of a ceremony I did a few years back. The Wedding was in a room in a small hotel in Cheshire, which had a bar adjacent to it with a TV showing .. the Grand National. All you could hear through the walls were the squeals of the viewers as they cheered their horses on! I'll have a tenner on pure silence! Somebody call the bookies....

You serious?...

I can write about this now because I've spoken to tomorrow's bride and we've had a laugh about it, but when I asked her to think about which 'formal' shots she'd like me to arrange she presented me with a list of twenty-six different group shots! And that's before I start to take any pictures of her and her new husband! Fortunately, when I pointed out that shooting all those arrangements would take up quite a bit of her Wedding Day she was quite relaxed about it. "Why do you need so many variations?.." I asked her. "Well.." she said "I don't really. I just copied a list my friend had had at her Wedding!..."

Phew...

Party, party ..

It's my lovely girlfriend's birthday today, and I need no more excuse than that to chuck an appropriate archive shot on the blog! Jeez, it's a long time since I've been to a party like that one, and thank God I don't have to go to another one ever again! Funny, isn't it? We all go on about ageing but, quite frankly, I wouldn't want to be that young again. I know everybody says it but I feel 'our generation' hit it just right with the best music, lifestyles and technological advances all within our 'four score' .. although, I admit, the jumpers needed working on!
Anyway, put that down .. that's my beer!...

Poo...

Take dog for walk. Check! Pick up poo and put in bag. Check! Drop bag on floor and walk off. Check!...

Just what is the mentality of some people? Lesley and I can follow these trails of poo bags all around the streets in which we live. Inconsiderate dog-walkers who seem to think it's actually still ok to leave their animals' plop all over the roads. Still, I suppose it's better than not bagging it at all, but it's yet another indicator of the fact that standards are sliding down the pan in this country. Yesterday's blog was going to be about the general decline in decency and politeness in the UK. Just the little 'thank-you' and 'You're welcome' stuff that makes you feel warm and noticed - whether you're giving or receiving the acknowledgement. We seem such a glum, insular, hardened society now that it's almost as if it's a sign of weakness to let someone know you've appreciated their efforts. Well, it was going to be about that, until Angela and Robert emailed me from Thailand with a lovely 'Thank you' note for their Wedding photography. See, there I go, talking sh*t again!...

It may be winter outside..

Despite everything, there are signs of Spring out there, folks! We have frogspawn in the pond .. and bird-plop all over my windscreen! Better weather's on its way, folks. Just be patient!..

Now, I have to admit I've been somewhat knocked off my theme this morning. I'd just sat down to write today's blog when an email popped through from Thailand. It was a fantastic 'Thank you' from last weekend's bride and groom, who've taken the time - on their honeymoon - to send me some kind words about their Wedding Photography. I'll share a sentence or two with you .. if you insist! Firstly, they wrote "We've just sat down and looked at our on-line gallery and all we can say is WOW! The moments you captured were amazing, it's such a nice feeling looking back through the pictures and thinking, we didn't see that!! They will be our memories to treasure of the best day of our lives, and thats all thanks to you" and then they wrote "We cannot thank you enough for your hard work on that freezing cold day, you definitely helped make the most of a snowy situation!!"

How does that song go? Ah, yes! "It may be winter outside, but in my heart it's Spring..."

You'd be a fool to miss it..

And so off we go into the fourth installment of my Twelve for '13 documentary photography archive and, if my fingers can type on this unseasonably cold April 1st, I can tell you that this month we have everything from photographs of Eccles Outdoor market to Jumbo jets and stage diving at a punk gig! In between, supermarkets, nightclubs and the demolition of old Salford. I hope you enjoy it...

How Egg-citing...

Happy Easter, everybody! Hope you're shelling out on a few treats for the family - or getting laid! (Tut! Martin....) Anyway, no word of a yoke, it's April Fool's day tomorrow but it's also the day my next Twelve for '13 installment hits the world-wide interwobble, so get that Cadbury's down yer neck and be all ready to log on in the morning! Eggs-act time to be decided!..

Happy Fleaster..

Easter was always a busy time for a press photographer on a local newspaper. The bank holiday kick-started the new season, not only with all the numerous Easter events, but with the rash of Spring fairs, jumble sales and flea markets that were the staple of a young snapper's job sheet in the 70s. Funny to think, now, but there just isn't the space in newspapers anymore to feature that kind of 'street-level' community activity. What a shame! It meant you hadn't had to have committed a crime, or complained about a gas-bill, or had a dispute about a garden fence to get into your local 'paper. Good news was news in those days and, more to the point, covering that sort of event - handfuls every weekend - was great training for a shy 18 year old like me - teaching me how to break the ice with 'the public' and, daft as it sounds, giving me the chance to get my creative juices flowing. After all, it was simply too easy to come away from each jumble sale with the same shot! On that point, I just thought I'd show you this little run of shots from my archive. It's the doorway to a Flea Market in, I think, Flixton, south Manchester. They were actually selling fleas! Only joking! Happy Easter...

Born again..

The resurrection! The re-birth! No, not Easter, but the fact that Jessops has been brought back to life by that Dragon's Den dude off the telly! Today sees him open 30 or so of the camera shops back on the high street in a relaunch not many saw coming. His strategy? Sell the goods in the shops at the same price people can buy 'em from the internet! Radical, eh? However, if you're a blog regular, you'll know that I myself witnessed at first hand the ridiculous approach that got Jessops in all that trouble in the first place. I went to buy a Fuji X10 from their Warrington store and was told, after I'd had a good look at it and decided I wanted one, to go home and order it from the 'net as it would be £50 cheaper! Not only that, I could come back to the store and collect it! Work that one out! So, here's hoping Dragon's Den can work its Easter magic on the brand, and Jessops turns out to be an all-round good egg after all!

Technical note : Today's picture, a charming portrait of one of the new twins in our family (No, I don't know which one!) was shot on the aforementioned X10, set to f2 and super-macro. Now go out and get a life, why don't you!..

Freeze!...

Forgive me a little wayward irreverence, but I just wanted to share my thoughts on this freezing weather! It is ARSE! Ah, that's better .. and now the sports news! Oh, forget that! I didn't watch the England game last night but I heard the score and all I can say is .. refer to photo above! Actually, one of those backsides is my brother's! England should have had him in the nets last night! Nothing would squeeze past those chunkers!...

Anyway .. I spent yesterday shooting almost 100 different Wedding invitations for my friend Sam, who's just moved from her old place into a brand spanking new Design Studio in Thelwall. Needless to say - he said, needlessly - it's a fantastic venue and I highly recommend it if you're looking for some funky Wedding invites!..

Don't forget that this Bank Holiday Weekend sees us hit the first of April, and I'm not joking when I say you're in for a treat. The next installment of my Twelve for '13 project goes online though relax, you won't be seeing this shot up there. In fact, there's not a bum shot in sight!..

Use your head..

Just when I start to really focus on the year's Weddings, there's a sudden flurry of PR activity! Yesterday was great for public relations enquiries and bookings, and April looks set to be busy on all fronts! I dived into my archive to find an appropriate shot to accompany today's blog and, to my amusement, came up with this image. I think this chap was the owner - or something high up! - in the American Golf Company. We needed to get a portrait for some news story or other, and I thought using his bonce as a tee would be a good idea! Now, it'll tell you everything you need to know when I say I shot this on 645 transparency film. In other words, it was pre-photoshop and we really did have to have someone swinging a golf club at the poor guy's nut! I asked him to look worried. I don't think I needed to! Funniest bit for me? Trying to celloptape the golf ball to his head! Fore...

What I found..

Crikey, Saturday's Wedding was interesting! It was freezing cold, it was snowing and it was blowing a gale, but there was only one thing that bugged me on the day! I'd done a recce at the venue, Worsley Court House, earlier in the week, and found a great spot in which to shoot some lovely portraits. It was sheltered, it was close to the front door, and it was a perfect site to show off the black and white architecture of the building. So, I got to the reception after the church ceremony to find .. they'd stuck a bloody gazebo there for the smokers! Aaaaaagh!.... Congratulations to Robert and Angela, by the way!

I went to see Johnny Marr after the Wedding - first time I've seen him since the days (27 years ago!) of The Smiths. I'd already been disappointed by his new album, so went to the gig with no great expectations. I was right not to get my hopes up. It was so boring! I just don't like his new songs at all, and I only managed to perk up whenever he played any Smiths' songs. However, the evening wasn't a total waste. I was handed a 'What's on' flyer for the venue to find .. The Exploited are there in May! Alright!.... Throw me into that mosh-pit of fifty-odd year old punks! Just watch me glasses!...

Nice day for a ..

 ..White Wedding!


See, that's the trouble with us English. We're always going on about the weather!
Well, guess what! I'm not bloody surprised! Look at it! Snow everywhere, my plant pots blown over in the gales, freezing temperatures .. and a Wedding to shoot! But guess what else... I can't flippin' wait! It's going to be such an exciting challenge to get the best from today's conditions! I'm off to Worsley Court House, which is going to look fantastic in the snow with its Tudor black and white exterior.
Angela, Robert ... I hope you're up for this! Brrrr......

Time, part two..

I'm trying to keep my mind off today's horizontal snow and the fact that I'll probably be shooting tomorrow's Wedding in it, so I thought I'd change the subject and highlight my new 'Photo-Restoration' service! I noticed at my Eccles exhibition that a lot of people had a lot of old photographs, and most of them had seen better days! (The photographs, not the people! Although now that I've typed that I'm not so sure! Sorry folks, only joking!) Anyway, I started to plug the fact that, at studiofivefour.com, I can do a good job of bringing them back to life - removing scratches and rips and so on - although I didn't expect my first order to be the removal of a whole person! I'm very pleased with the results, and it's so satisfying to bring these old images back into good condition. I can't help thinking about the people in the shots, though. Who are/were they? What was going on when the pictures were shot? What were they like when they were photographed? We saw the oldest ever image of the Universe being displayed yesterday, and I think it's incredible that we can see that far back in time but, sitting here at my Mac, I think my little glimpses of the past are just as poignant.

Time, gentlemen....

I follow Guinness on Facebook - the drink, not the actor - and they posed the question yesterday "When was the last time you laughed out loud?" When I saw the price of a pint! .. I replied, although I think they might have removed my comment by now! Old Georgey Osborne might have knocked a penny off the price of a beer, but it still costs rather a lot to go out of an evening these days, doesn't it! In fact, Lesley and I still joke about one of our earliest dates. We had a glass of wine each in a posh pub in Wilmslow, and the bill came to £14! Fourteen quid? That'd keep me in cheap cider for three days! Makes me laugh when people say it's the smoking ban that's killing the pub trade! No .. it's the price of the drink, dudes! Do the math, as they say in The States! Anyway, I thought this shot was an appropriate accompaniment to today's rant - a boarded-up pub called The Museum! "Oh yes, dear grandchild, in the old days people used to go in them all the time!"

A long road ahead, sunshine..

I didn't know whether to write about the Vernal Equinox or the Budget today, so I've sort of combined the two in this shot of mine from the Nullarbor Desert in Australia. If you look closely you can just see the headlights of a truck, heading towards the camera, so it sort of felt like 'A long road ahead', which suited my Budget theme .. but it also features a sunset, so I'm using that to illustrate the fact that the hours of daylight are now equal to those of the night. Summer's on the way, but what else is looming in the darkness? Over to you, Mr Osborne!..

The only way is up..

If you must know, I'm going up the wall at the moment. I have so many projects that are just on the verge of coming together .. hopefully .. and it's driving me mad! In the ideal world we'd be a month down the line and I'd be writing things like "Oh, yes!" .. and "Guess what!".. but, at the moment, all I can do is keep schtum and keep my fingers crossed. Now I realise that makes for the most boring blog in the world and I apologise, but hey, at least it gives me an excuse to show you yet another shot from my Twelve for '13 archive! And yes, that is one of the projects that I'm waiting for an answer on! Bad grammar, point made! Now pass me my crampons...

It's an age thing..

I spent yesterday afternoon shooting a lovely set of baby portraits for a young couple who've just had twin girls! Double trouble, eh? When one was happy, the other was crying - when one was feeding the other was being winded - when one was .. oh, you get the idea! I did ask if I could just go back for a re-shoot in 15 years! Only joking, it was lovely, and the smiles on the faces of the grandmas said it all! (Eeeek! The 'G' word! Oh boy, am I in trouble for that!)

My new exhibition opened on Saturday and, for the third month in a row, I am part of the work that's up on the walls of Eccles Community Art Gallery. Music photography this time, and it kicked off some really interesting chat with people who came to see the pictures. One fascinating chap was even telling me about going to see the Human League .. before they were the Human League! That must have been Almost Medieval (That's a Human League joke but I guess you had to be there, ho hum!)

Anyway, the Wedding bookings are looking healthy, I'm pleased to say, and guess what! The bride that booked me yesterday for her Wedding next August is one of twins, and her sister will be the Chief Bridesmaid! What a coincidence! I worked out that if Sunday's little nippers get a move on I could just about shoot their Weddings before I become an Octogenarian!

OMG!....... 

Maier may not!....

I shot this yesterday afternoon, and threw it straight into my 'Seen' project on Flickr. Pretty wild, isn't it? Makes you wonder what you're actually looking at! (Answers in the comments section, please!) I did a double-take myself yesterday when I logged on to look at a new sale of Vivian Maier prints at a gallery in London. They're going from £1, 300 upwards! Limited Editions of 15 prints! So ok, I won't be owning one of those any time soon! I hate all that art world snobbery of the limited edition. What does it matter if you buy the first or the 3 millionth in a run of prints. Unless you only print ONE of anything then every single other print is a copy, and you might as well shove 'em on your website for a tenner each! Oh, cue commercial break. Hey, wanna buy one of my unlimited edition Twelve for '13 prints? The nearest I get to four figures with these mamas is if I put in the decimal point! £15.00? Bargain!...

Take a seat..

God, I need a sit down! Had a really busy day down in Cheltenham yesterday shooting what turns out to be the images for a catalogue at the upcoming Milan Furniture Fair, no less! Absolutely beautiful, bespoke pieces, but shot so close to deadline that one table was still being made as I worked on all the other items! I think I did a great job, though! (Modest as ever!) I had to hoik up a temporary studio in a gap next to the MD's desk - or was he the chairman?! - set the lighting, choose the angles, physically lug every piece in and out of the frame, actually shoot the pesky things then download everything to the company's computer. I reckon that'd take about 73 people if it was shot in a 'proper' studio! Damn! I'm not charging enough!!

Stuck in the past...

"I'm off to Cheltenham on Thursday.." I said to the lads at badminton last night "Oh, yes?.." they nodded "Off to the races, are you?" .... Oh, bugger! The one day I have to go down there and the bloomin' Gold Cup's on! Never mind, I'm shooting furniture - it's going nowhere - so I'll get there when I get there and that's the end of it! I have to admit, though, that when I do get stuck in a jam I can't help but get a little smug. "These guys have to do this every day" .. I say to myself as I swap CDs "These guys spend half their lives in traffic! How awful!.." and I smile 'cos it is rather nice, in a scary kinda way, to think that I haven't actually had to go to work since 1978!

Tell you what, when I am swapping CDs in the morning I won't be putting on the new one by Johnny Marr. My copy arrived yesterday - eagerly awaited, of course - but what a disappointment it is! What dreary mush, what over-hyped drivel. Same as the new album by Everything Everything! I'm afraid they just don't do it for me and so it seems that, despite my best efforts I am, just like all these cars from my archive, well and truly stuck in the past!!...

Mild or bitter?...

I gave a talk last night to Salford Photographic Group, and took the opportunity to 'try out' some of my old photographs in front of a new audience. I showed them the 12 photographs in my project 'Boardom', which were all shot on the morning of Valentine's Day, 1993. I'll leave it to you to learn more about them by clicking here if you're intrigued, but it's interesting to see how, 20 years on, so much has changed .. and so much has stayed the same. The theme was recession, closure, downturn .. ring any bells? .. but, as always with a camera, its inescapable ability to capture everything that's in front of it is so much to the fore. There is nothing in this photograph that exists anymore. The pub, The Rovers Return, is long gone, the newspaper in the shot (Ah, you'll have to read the blurb now!) is no longer published .. and even the brewery has closed down! One thing hasn't changed, though. I've yet to get anyone interested in showing this work!

Flex the pecs...

Well, I'm as shocked as you are! I mean, I knew my camera bag was getting heavier and heavier but .. Holy Moley! .. I just happened to glance at myself in the mirror the other day and this is what I saw! Sure builds you up, lugging all that gear around!

Actually, I am a bugger for insisting that I take everything on a job with me, and my rucksack is getting heavier all the time, but you just never know when you might need that 500mm mirror lens, that 10mm fisheye or that full set of gels for the speedlights (Three SB900s, since you ask) I think I even have about 20 spare AA batteries in one of the pouches but hey, I ain't never gonna run outta anything when I'm on a job! My kit even consists now of two video-lights, which I love because you can just switch 'em on and leave 'em anywhere in a shot without having to guess what part of the image they're going to light, so I'm now up to a rucksack, a bag for those lights and a carrier for all the stands and brollies. Oh, and a tripod! It's no wonder the pecs are perking up!..

(Ok, it's not really me! Did I get you going? So realistic, isn't it! Naaaa, believe it or not, these are the muscles of my cousin Paul George, who I'm very proud to say is a power-lifting/body-sculpting/bisto-wearing world-champeen! Thanks for the borrow, Paul! Sorry about the bisto joke! Don't hurt me, Paul, don't.... aaaaagh!)

He's behind you..

I love that moment when I arrive at a bride's house to start her Wedding photography, 'cos it's just about the only thing about her Big Day that hasn't been rehearsed! The dress has been tucked and tightened, the hair style's been designed, the make-up's been mastered .. even the food's been tasted .. but there'll always be a buzz in the air when I arrive to start my work, as it suddenly dawns on everybody that this day .. this time the dress goes on .. it's for real!
No wonder this young lady needed a glass of fizz!..

Alright, flower?..

 Aaaah, normality has returned! The new series of Gardners' World starts on telly tonight, and my Wedding season is up and running at last! I thought a nice picture of a bridal bouquet would tie those two facts together nicely. On the subject of flowers though, my Florescence exhibition finishes tomorrow at Eccles Community Art Gallery but, just when I thought I was all done and dusted, I've been invited to take part in their next exhibition, and this time my theme is .. my music photography! Cue another flower photo! Yay! Yes, so this time I'll be showing some Smiths, some Joy Division and, er .. some other shots from my music archive. (Not quite got that sorted, yet!) This means I'll now will have had some of my photographs on display at the gallery for three full months! Bloomin' amazing!..

The Darling Buds of March..

I think the nicer weather's got the sap rising in my clients, and the PR work is suddenly popping out all over! This week alone my commissions are as varied as a shoot for a trade union and a portrait session for an insurance company, as well as a shoot for an actual PR company's website! I also have to come up with a front cover for a local magazine before Monday, and then I'm off to Cheltenham for a furniture shoot next week! In between that I need to prepare a talk I'm giving to a Camera Club on Monday, and then I've got the last day of my Florescence Photography exhibition on Saturday. Where will I get the time to write my blog?...

Fag break..

This is one of my favourite photographs from the March installment of Twelve for '13. A moment within a moment! It's Christmas, at a swanky dinner - I actually remember it was at Buile Hill Park, in Salford - and this waitress has just finished setting her places. It's time for a fag! Imagine that! Never mind smoking indoors - that's the first moment captured - but lighting up right there and then 'at work' as it were! You can even see from her expression that she knows she's pushing it a bit! And the second moment? Well, she looks like she's just about to get a right royal rollicking from the lady zooming in from the right! Her supervisor, maybe? "Put that out, Gladys!.." you can imagine her shouting! "How very dare you!"

Ah, the eighties! And wow, the Olympus XA! What a camera that was! It did a really good job of capturing those instants, in low light .. on film. The shots I took with it make up my book Don't Miss This, and this image sums up the ethos of that book perfectly. In every picture there's something else happening, something you mustn't miss! I highly recommend you don't miss out on a copy!

What I did at the weekend...

The sun was out yesterday and so were the snowdrops, looking lovely in the park. The sight brought out the photography enthusiasts, too .. although I'm not so sure about one couple I saw who both had huge tripods with little compact cameras stuck on top - in that light! They either had the DTs from Saturday night or shot everything at f22! Anyway, I was in the park to shoot an engagement portrait for Laura and Chris, which they'll use as a Signing Board at their Wedding at Thornton Hall Hotel in April. Can't wait to get cracking on their Big Day!..

I was on the verge of selling my old Mamiya RZ 67 gear this weekend. It's a medium-format camera that I used to use for Weddings and magazine shoots, but I haven't used any of it for at least five or six years. I have bodies, backs, lenses, viewfinders .. the works! Trouble was, I looked at the prices the gear's going for online, and put it all straight back in the case. I couldn't insult such fantastic equipment by letting it go for such painfully low return. I now have some of the most expensive ornaments known to mankind and, unless someone can lend me £25K for a digital back, it's likely to stay that way for a very long time!

I hope Her Maj is feeling a little better after her bout of Gastroenteritis. I remember back in the 90s when I got the commission to shoot her at a three-day event in Hyde Park and, naturally, the adrenalin was a' flowin'! "Don't be nervous.." my old Dad told me "She's just a normal person like the rest of us. Try to imagine her on the toilet!..."

On that note ...

Giggs/God..

Ryan Giggs has signed another year-long contract for Manchester United, and will still be playing for them when he's forty! As a nod to his longevity I dived into my files to find you my shot of Ryan with George Best - a pair of legends if ever there was one - but overshot my alphabetic filing system and came to this shot of 'God' by mistake. (Ok, I know this is Jesus but he's technically the same thing - just ask any of our trustworthy Cardinals!) It's a photo of a sticker on a taxi headlight in Brazil, so .. Freudian slip? Giggs/God? Is it a sign? Actually, thinking about it, it does look more like George Best, doesn't it!

Marching on ..

The first of March, and time for - drum roll - the third installment of Twelve for '13, my year-long display of archive photographs. This month's offerings flit from CB fans to chip shops, abandoned cars to my sister's bedroom! (Behave!) Hey, there's even a colour shot this time - one from my meagre collection of colour slides from the time (Well, they were expensive!) I'm intrigued by my Blog Shot today, though. It was taken at Eccles army cadets, so it's no later than about May of 1976, when I was still 15 years old, and I'm assuming it's a tribute to - or possible complete rip-off of -  an Elliott Erwitt photograph, which I first saw in his book 'Photographs and Anti-photographs' in 1974. (To my shame - I'm blushing - I stole this book from our school library and, years later, actually got it signed by the great man himself! So you're not having it back, St Pat's!) Anyway, if you ever see the shot I'm talking about, you'll see a black GI sticking his tongue out at Mr Erwitt's camera, just like the kid's doing in my shot, though whether I asked him to do it because I'd seen Elliott's shot, or simply caught it as he did it, I will never know! I know we're all influenced by others, and I know humour is a very important part of my photography, so all I can say is I'm glad I discoverd Erwitt at 14 and not Bill Brandt! Anyway, crack on and go see my latest set of archive shots. Quick march...

Oh, yes...

I was chillin' and having some 'me' time last evening - you know the kind of thing - gin in glass, Smiths on turntable .. and a copy of a Japanese Photography magazine in my hands. It's called Camera Life, and I bought it when I went over to Tokyo for my Joy Division exhibition. Trouble is, it being in Japanese and all that, I haven't the foggiest idea what it's actually going on about! However, it comes with a strap-line - in English (Well, almost!) - across the front page, and I wanted to share it with you. It says ..

"Camera Life proposes happiness to your camera and photograph life"

Isn't that great? Wouldn't you just want that as a photographer?

Guess what! I've got it!...