How Egg-citing...

Happy Easter, everybody! Hope you're shelling out on a few treats for the family - or getting laid! (Tut! Martin....) Anyway, no word of a yoke, it's April Fool's day tomorrow but it's also the day my next Twelve for '13 installment hits the world-wide interwobble, so get that Cadbury's down yer neck and be all ready to log on in the morning! Eggs-act time to be decided!..

Happy Fleaster..

Easter was always a busy time for a press photographer on a local newspaper. The bank holiday kick-started the new season, not only with all the numerous Easter events, but with the rash of Spring fairs, jumble sales and flea markets that were the staple of a young snapper's job sheet in the 70s. Funny to think, now, but there just isn't the space in newspapers anymore to feature that kind of 'street-level' community activity. What a shame! It meant you hadn't had to have committed a crime, or complained about a gas-bill, or had a dispute about a garden fence to get into your local 'paper. Good news was news in those days and, more to the point, covering that sort of event - handfuls every weekend - was great training for a shy 18 year old like me - teaching me how to break the ice with 'the public' and, daft as it sounds, giving me the chance to get my creative juices flowing. After all, it was simply too easy to come away from each jumble sale with the same shot! On that point, I just thought I'd show you this little run of shots from my archive. It's the doorway to a Flea Market in, I think, Flixton, south Manchester. They were actually selling fleas! Only joking! Happy Easter...

Born again..

The resurrection! The re-birth! No, not Easter, but the fact that Jessops has been brought back to life by that Dragon's Den dude off the telly! Today sees him open 30 or so of the camera shops back on the high street in a relaunch not many saw coming. His strategy? Sell the goods in the shops at the same price people can buy 'em from the internet! Radical, eh? However, if you're a blog regular, you'll know that I myself witnessed at first hand the ridiculous approach that got Jessops in all that trouble in the first place. I went to buy a Fuji X10 from their Warrington store and was told, after I'd had a good look at it and decided I wanted one, to go home and order it from the 'net as it would be £50 cheaper! Not only that, I could come back to the store and collect it! Work that one out! So, here's hoping Dragon's Den can work its Easter magic on the brand, and Jessops turns out to be an all-round good egg after all!

Technical note : Today's picture, a charming portrait of one of the new twins in our family (No, I don't know which one!) was shot on the aforementioned X10, set to f2 and super-macro. Now go out and get a life, why don't you!..

Freeze!...

Forgive me a little wayward irreverence, but I just wanted to share my thoughts on this freezing weather! It is ARSE! Ah, that's better .. and now the sports news! Oh, forget that! I didn't watch the England game last night but I heard the score and all I can say is .. refer to photo above! Actually, one of those backsides is my brother's! England should have had him in the nets last night! Nothing would squeeze past those chunkers!...

Anyway .. I spent yesterday shooting almost 100 different Wedding invitations for my friend Sam, who's just moved from her old place into a brand spanking new Design Studio in Thelwall. Needless to say - he said, needlessly - it's a fantastic venue and I highly recommend it if you're looking for some funky Wedding invites!..

Don't forget that this Bank Holiday Weekend sees us hit the first of April, and I'm not joking when I say you're in for a treat. The next installment of my Twelve for '13 project goes online though relax, you won't be seeing this shot up there. In fact, there's not a bum shot in sight!..

Use your head..

Just when I start to really focus on the year's Weddings, there's a sudden flurry of PR activity! Yesterday was great for public relations enquiries and bookings, and April looks set to be busy on all fronts! I dived into my archive to find an appropriate shot to accompany today's blog and, to my amusement, came up with this image. I think this chap was the owner - or something high up! - in the American Golf Company. We needed to get a portrait for some news story or other, and I thought using his bonce as a tee would be a good idea! Now, it'll tell you everything you need to know when I say I shot this on 645 transparency film. In other words, it was pre-photoshop and we really did have to have someone swinging a golf club at the poor guy's nut! I asked him to look worried. I don't think I needed to! Funniest bit for me? Trying to celloptape the golf ball to his head! Fore...

What I found..

Crikey, Saturday's Wedding was interesting! It was freezing cold, it was snowing and it was blowing a gale, but there was only one thing that bugged me on the day! I'd done a recce at the venue, Worsley Court House, earlier in the week, and found a great spot in which to shoot some lovely portraits. It was sheltered, it was close to the front door, and it was a perfect site to show off the black and white architecture of the building. So, I got to the reception after the church ceremony to find .. they'd stuck a bloody gazebo there for the smokers! Aaaaaagh!.... Congratulations to Robert and Angela, by the way!

I went to see Johnny Marr after the Wedding - first time I've seen him since the days (27 years ago!) of The Smiths. I'd already been disappointed by his new album, so went to the gig with no great expectations. I was right not to get my hopes up. It was so boring! I just don't like his new songs at all, and I only managed to perk up whenever he played any Smiths' songs. However, the evening wasn't a total waste. I was handed a 'What's on' flyer for the venue to find .. The Exploited are there in May! Alright!.... Throw me into that mosh-pit of fifty-odd year old punks! Just watch me glasses!...

Nice day for a ..

 ..White Wedding!


See, that's the trouble with us English. We're always going on about the weather!
Well, guess what! I'm not bloody surprised! Look at it! Snow everywhere, my plant pots blown over in the gales, freezing temperatures .. and a Wedding to shoot! But guess what else... I can't flippin' wait! It's going to be such an exciting challenge to get the best from today's conditions! I'm off to Worsley Court House, which is going to look fantastic in the snow with its Tudor black and white exterior.
Angela, Robert ... I hope you're up for this! Brrrr......

Time, part two..

I'm trying to keep my mind off today's horizontal snow and the fact that I'll probably be shooting tomorrow's Wedding in it, so I thought I'd change the subject and highlight my new 'Photo-Restoration' service! I noticed at my Eccles exhibition that a lot of people had a lot of old photographs, and most of them had seen better days! (The photographs, not the people! Although now that I've typed that I'm not so sure! Sorry folks, only joking!) Anyway, I started to plug the fact that, at studiofivefour.com, I can do a good job of bringing them back to life - removing scratches and rips and so on - although I didn't expect my first order to be the removal of a whole person! I'm very pleased with the results, and it's so satisfying to bring these old images back into good condition. I can't help thinking about the people in the shots, though. Who are/were they? What was going on when the pictures were shot? What were they like when they were photographed? We saw the oldest ever image of the Universe being displayed yesterday, and I think it's incredible that we can see that far back in time but, sitting here at my Mac, I think my little glimpses of the past are just as poignant.

Time, gentlemen....

I follow Guinness on Facebook - the drink, not the actor - and they posed the question yesterday "When was the last time you laughed out loud?" When I saw the price of a pint! .. I replied, although I think they might have removed my comment by now! Old Georgey Osborne might have knocked a penny off the price of a beer, but it still costs rather a lot to go out of an evening these days, doesn't it! In fact, Lesley and I still joke about one of our earliest dates. We had a glass of wine each in a posh pub in Wilmslow, and the bill came to £14! Fourteen quid? That'd keep me in cheap cider for three days! Makes me laugh when people say it's the smoking ban that's killing the pub trade! No .. it's the price of the drink, dudes! Do the math, as they say in The States! Anyway, I thought this shot was an appropriate accompaniment to today's rant - a boarded-up pub called The Museum! "Oh yes, dear grandchild, in the old days people used to go in them all the time!"

A long road ahead, sunshine..

I didn't know whether to write about the Vernal Equinox or the Budget today, so I've sort of combined the two in this shot of mine from the Nullarbor Desert in Australia. If you look closely you can just see the headlights of a truck, heading towards the camera, so it sort of felt like 'A long road ahead', which suited my Budget theme .. but it also features a sunset, so I'm using that to illustrate the fact that the hours of daylight are now equal to those of the night. Summer's on the way, but what else is looming in the darkness? Over to you, Mr Osborne!..

The only way is up..

If you must know, I'm going up the wall at the moment. I have so many projects that are just on the verge of coming together .. hopefully .. and it's driving me mad! In the ideal world we'd be a month down the line and I'd be writing things like "Oh, yes!" .. and "Guess what!".. but, at the moment, all I can do is keep schtum and keep my fingers crossed. Now I realise that makes for the most boring blog in the world and I apologise, but hey, at least it gives me an excuse to show you yet another shot from my Twelve for '13 archive! And yes, that is one of the projects that I'm waiting for an answer on! Bad grammar, point made! Now pass me my crampons...

It's an age thing..

I spent yesterday afternoon shooting a lovely set of baby portraits for a young couple who've just had twin girls! Double trouble, eh? When one was happy, the other was crying - when one was feeding the other was being winded - when one was .. oh, you get the idea! I did ask if I could just go back for a re-shoot in 15 years! Only joking, it was lovely, and the smiles on the faces of the grandmas said it all! (Eeeek! The 'G' word! Oh boy, am I in trouble for that!)

My new exhibition opened on Saturday and, for the third month in a row, I am part of the work that's up on the walls of Eccles Community Art Gallery. Music photography this time, and it kicked off some really interesting chat with people who came to see the pictures. One fascinating chap was even telling me about going to see the Human League .. before they were the Human League! That must have been Almost Medieval (That's a Human League joke but I guess you had to be there, ho hum!)

Anyway, the Wedding bookings are looking healthy, I'm pleased to say, and guess what! The bride that booked me yesterday for her Wedding next August is one of twins, and her sister will be the Chief Bridesmaid! What a coincidence! I worked out that if Sunday's little nippers get a move on I could just about shoot their Weddings before I become an Octogenarian!

OMG!....... 

Maier may not!....

I shot this yesterday afternoon, and threw it straight into my 'Seen' project on Flickr. Pretty wild, isn't it? Makes you wonder what you're actually looking at! (Answers in the comments section, please!) I did a double-take myself yesterday when I logged on to look at a new sale of Vivian Maier prints at a gallery in London. They're going from £1, 300 upwards! Limited Editions of 15 prints! So ok, I won't be owning one of those any time soon! I hate all that art world snobbery of the limited edition. What does it matter if you buy the first or the 3 millionth in a run of prints. Unless you only print ONE of anything then every single other print is a copy, and you might as well shove 'em on your website for a tenner each! Oh, cue commercial break. Hey, wanna buy one of my unlimited edition Twelve for '13 prints? The nearest I get to four figures with these mamas is if I put in the decimal point! £15.00? Bargain!...

Take a seat..

God, I need a sit down! Had a really busy day down in Cheltenham yesterday shooting what turns out to be the images for a catalogue at the upcoming Milan Furniture Fair, no less! Absolutely beautiful, bespoke pieces, but shot so close to deadline that one table was still being made as I worked on all the other items! I think I did a great job, though! (Modest as ever!) I had to hoik up a temporary studio in a gap next to the MD's desk - or was he the chairman?! - set the lighting, choose the angles, physically lug every piece in and out of the frame, actually shoot the pesky things then download everything to the company's computer. I reckon that'd take about 73 people if it was shot in a 'proper' studio! Damn! I'm not charging enough!!

Stuck in the past...

"I'm off to Cheltenham on Thursday.." I said to the lads at badminton last night "Oh, yes?.." they nodded "Off to the races, are you?" .... Oh, bugger! The one day I have to go down there and the bloomin' Gold Cup's on! Never mind, I'm shooting furniture - it's going nowhere - so I'll get there when I get there and that's the end of it! I have to admit, though, that when I do get stuck in a jam I can't help but get a little smug. "These guys have to do this every day" .. I say to myself as I swap CDs "These guys spend half their lives in traffic! How awful!.." and I smile 'cos it is rather nice, in a scary kinda way, to think that I haven't actually had to go to work since 1978!

Tell you what, when I am swapping CDs in the morning I won't be putting on the new one by Johnny Marr. My copy arrived yesterday - eagerly awaited, of course - but what a disappointment it is! What dreary mush, what over-hyped drivel. Same as the new album by Everything Everything! I'm afraid they just don't do it for me and so it seems that, despite my best efforts I am, just like all these cars from my archive, well and truly stuck in the past!!...

Mild or bitter?...

I gave a talk last night to Salford Photographic Group, and took the opportunity to 'try out' some of my old photographs in front of a new audience. I showed them the 12 photographs in my project 'Boardom', which were all shot on the morning of Valentine's Day, 1993. I'll leave it to you to learn more about them by clicking here if you're intrigued, but it's interesting to see how, 20 years on, so much has changed .. and so much has stayed the same. The theme was recession, closure, downturn .. ring any bells? .. but, as always with a camera, its inescapable ability to capture everything that's in front of it is so much to the fore. There is nothing in this photograph that exists anymore. The pub, The Rovers Return, is long gone, the newspaper in the shot (Ah, you'll have to read the blurb now!) is no longer published .. and even the brewery has closed down! One thing hasn't changed, though. I've yet to get anyone interested in showing this work!

Flex the pecs...

Well, I'm as shocked as you are! I mean, I knew my camera bag was getting heavier and heavier but .. Holy Moley! .. I just happened to glance at myself in the mirror the other day and this is what I saw! Sure builds you up, lugging all that gear around!

Actually, I am a bugger for insisting that I take everything on a job with me, and my rucksack is getting heavier all the time, but you just never know when you might need that 500mm mirror lens, that 10mm fisheye or that full set of gels for the speedlights (Three SB900s, since you ask) I think I even have about 20 spare AA batteries in one of the pouches but hey, I ain't never gonna run outta anything when I'm on a job! My kit even consists now of two video-lights, which I love because you can just switch 'em on and leave 'em anywhere in a shot without having to guess what part of the image they're going to light, so I'm now up to a rucksack, a bag for those lights and a carrier for all the stands and brollies. Oh, and a tripod! It's no wonder the pecs are perking up!..

(Ok, it's not really me! Did I get you going? So realistic, isn't it! Naaaa, believe it or not, these are the muscles of my cousin Paul George, who I'm very proud to say is a power-lifting/body-sculpting/bisto-wearing world-champeen! Thanks for the borrow, Paul! Sorry about the bisto joke! Don't hurt me, Paul, don't.... aaaaagh!)

He's behind you..

I love that moment when I arrive at a bride's house to start her Wedding photography, 'cos it's just about the only thing about her Big Day that hasn't been rehearsed! The dress has been tucked and tightened, the hair style's been designed, the make-up's been mastered .. even the food's been tasted .. but there'll always be a buzz in the air when I arrive to start my work, as it suddenly dawns on everybody that this day .. this time the dress goes on .. it's for real!
No wonder this young lady needed a glass of fizz!..

Alright, flower?..

 Aaaah, normality has returned! The new series of Gardners' World starts on telly tonight, and my Wedding season is up and running at last! I thought a nice picture of a bridal bouquet would tie those two facts together nicely. On the subject of flowers though, my Florescence exhibition finishes tomorrow at Eccles Community Art Gallery but, just when I thought I was all done and dusted, I've been invited to take part in their next exhibition, and this time my theme is .. my music photography! Cue another flower photo! Yay! Yes, so this time I'll be showing some Smiths, some Joy Division and, er .. some other shots from my music archive. (Not quite got that sorted, yet!) This means I'll now will have had some of my photographs on display at the gallery for three full months! Bloomin' amazing!..

The Darling Buds of March..

I think the nicer weather's got the sap rising in my clients, and the PR work is suddenly popping out all over! This week alone my commissions are as varied as a shoot for a trade union and a portrait session for an insurance company, as well as a shoot for an actual PR company's website! I also have to come up with a front cover for a local magazine before Monday, and then I'm off to Cheltenham for a furniture shoot next week! In between that I need to prepare a talk I'm giving to a Camera Club on Monday, and then I've got the last day of my Florescence Photography exhibition on Saturday. Where will I get the time to write my blog?...

Fag break..

This is one of my favourite photographs from the March installment of Twelve for '13. A moment within a moment! It's Christmas, at a swanky dinner - I actually remember it was at Buile Hill Park, in Salford - and this waitress has just finished setting her places. It's time for a fag! Imagine that! Never mind smoking indoors - that's the first moment captured - but lighting up right there and then 'at work' as it were! You can even see from her expression that she knows she's pushing it a bit! And the second moment? Well, she looks like she's just about to get a right royal rollicking from the lady zooming in from the right! Her supervisor, maybe? "Put that out, Gladys!.." you can imagine her shouting! "How very dare you!"

Ah, the eighties! And wow, the Olympus XA! What a camera that was! It did a really good job of capturing those instants, in low light .. on film. The shots I took with it make up my book Don't Miss This, and this image sums up the ethos of that book perfectly. In every picture there's something else happening, something you mustn't miss! I highly recommend you don't miss out on a copy!

What I did at the weekend...

The sun was out yesterday and so were the snowdrops, looking lovely in the park. The sight brought out the photography enthusiasts, too .. although I'm not so sure about one couple I saw who both had huge tripods with little compact cameras stuck on top - in that light! They either had the DTs from Saturday night or shot everything at f22! Anyway, I was in the park to shoot an engagement portrait for Laura and Chris, which they'll use as a Signing Board at their Wedding at Thornton Hall Hotel in April. Can't wait to get cracking on their Big Day!..

I was on the verge of selling my old Mamiya RZ 67 gear this weekend. It's a medium-format camera that I used to use for Weddings and magazine shoots, but I haven't used any of it for at least five or six years. I have bodies, backs, lenses, viewfinders .. the works! Trouble was, I looked at the prices the gear's going for online, and put it all straight back in the case. I couldn't insult such fantastic equipment by letting it go for such painfully low return. I now have some of the most expensive ornaments known to mankind and, unless someone can lend me £25K for a digital back, it's likely to stay that way for a very long time!

I hope Her Maj is feeling a little better after her bout of Gastroenteritis. I remember back in the 90s when I got the commission to shoot her at a three-day event in Hyde Park and, naturally, the adrenalin was a' flowin'! "Don't be nervous.." my old Dad told me "She's just a normal person like the rest of us. Try to imagine her on the toilet!..."

On that note ...

Giggs/God..

Ryan Giggs has signed another year-long contract for Manchester United, and will still be playing for them when he's forty! As a nod to his longevity I dived into my files to find you my shot of Ryan with George Best - a pair of legends if ever there was one - but overshot my alphabetic filing system and came to this shot of 'God' by mistake. (Ok, I know this is Jesus but he's technically the same thing - just ask any of our trustworthy Cardinals!) It's a photo of a sticker on a taxi headlight in Brazil, so .. Freudian slip? Giggs/God? Is it a sign? Actually, thinking about it, it does look more like George Best, doesn't it!

Marching on ..

The first of March, and time for - drum roll - the third installment of Twelve for '13, my year-long display of archive photographs. This month's offerings flit from CB fans to chip shops, abandoned cars to my sister's bedroom! (Behave!) Hey, there's even a colour shot this time - one from my meagre collection of colour slides from the time (Well, they were expensive!) I'm intrigued by my Blog Shot today, though. It was taken at Eccles army cadets, so it's no later than about May of 1976, when I was still 15 years old, and I'm assuming it's a tribute to - or possible complete rip-off of -  an Elliott Erwitt photograph, which I first saw in his book 'Photographs and Anti-photographs' in 1974. (To my shame - I'm blushing - I stole this book from our school library and, years later, actually got it signed by the great man himself! So you're not having it back, St Pat's!) Anyway, if you ever see the shot I'm talking about, you'll see a black GI sticking his tongue out at Mr Erwitt's camera, just like the kid's doing in my shot, though whether I asked him to do it because I'd seen Elliott's shot, or simply caught it as he did it, I will never know! I know we're all influenced by others, and I know humour is a very important part of my photography, so all I can say is I'm glad I discoverd Erwitt at 14 and not Bill Brandt! Anyway, crack on and go see my latest set of archive shots. Quick march...