Plane simple..

I've had a brilliant idea! This'll solve the housing shortage problem in one fell swoop. See that nearside lane on the motorways? Why don't we build on it? Get a long line of apartments put up along the whole length of the entire UK motorway system, and get those homeless people in 'em, pronto! Well, I mean, it's not as if the lane's used by motorists, is it? Not these days. No-one wants to be seen dead in the inside lane these days - no pun intended in view of my photograph today, which I'll get onto in a minute! Come to think of it, nobody even wants to be seen dead in the middle lane anymore. That's just used by moronic lorry drivers who've managed to get their wagons moving ONE mile an hour faster than the truck in front, so feel they can pull out and slow the traffic down for bleedin' miles! Has anyone else noticed this seemingly new trend of hogging the outside lane on the motorway? I drove to a PR shoot in Coventry yesterday and must have undertaken hundreds of cars, all stuck behind each other doing 65 mph in the outside lane whilst I whizzed past at 70 - on the dot! - in the nearside lane. Is it something to do with a vast influx of continental drivers or something, thinking they're all on the inside lane but forgetting which country they're in? Or is it that same old macho bullsh*t that kicks in when people get into their lovely, lovely cars? Look at me, look at my shiny brum-brum. Aren't I great! The lovely shiny white Audi brum-brum that was ahead of me yesterday was great. Was! 'Til it went straight into the VW in front and became a teeny weeny squished Audi, and made us all very annoyed as we queued up behind it! Yes folks, driving winds me up. Actually, no, it doesn't. The improper, selfish use of motorways winds me up! Now, crashing an old plane onto the cars on the M62 might be a bit drastic, but I really feel something needs to be done to educate a lot of the drivers in the UK!

PS: This plane crashed in '88, straight onto a 2CV. Oops! I got this shot used in the MEN after simply walking onto the hard-shoulder and taking my pix! Betcha can't do that these days!